26 years ago -
Gabriel
gasped for air but his lungs only received icy water. He tried again, but there
was no air remaining to inhale and – despite the freezing water – his chest
felt on fire. Panic overwhelmed him and Gabriel could feel his lungs starting
to explode.
His eyes closed sharply from the icy daggers that seemed
to penetrate his chest. His arms and legs struck out at the water trying to
grasp or strike anything within distance, but found nothing. The incessant
flailing did not help, but he could not help from doing it. He felt as though
he was having an uncontrollable seizure.
The
seizing stopped as the extra weight of the oversized jersey started to pull him
down, clinging tighter to his body and enveloping him. Dread filled his mind as
the icy surface above floated away from him.
The
cool-blue colored water and the white underneath of the frozen lake he found
himself under started to darken. He knew what this meant; no more hockey games,
no more pizza, and no possible chance of asking Suzanne out on a date. He was
going to die and there was nothing he could do about it. Where are the other kids? Where is Jacob? Why isn’t someone trying to
help me?
His mind swirled and a strange dizziness took over. Images
flew in and out of his thoughts. These ‘thoughts’ embracing him closely like
his mother did when he was a child. The difference was these delusional images,
although embracing him, did not caress him, like his mother once had. They were
more like tentacles that wrapped around his mind and suffocated him, stopping
him from any rational thought. He had heard that one’s life would flash before
their eyes right before they died. Where
was this mental video that should be playing?
Memories of old friends, family and even Rufus, grandma’s seventy-five pound basset hound, flooded his psyche. The instant intake of
images and recollections caused a fire within his brain that hurt as bad as the
fire in his lungs. The fire continued to grow. The burning crept from his brain
and chest and moved outwards to other parts of his body. He knew he was drowning,
but he never thought it could be this painful. Drowning was supposed to be a
peaceful way to die. When does it become peaceful!
Surprisingly, the coolness of the water no longer fazed
him. All he felt now was the inner heat that burned inside him; an internal
furnace that was constantly being fed and had no intention of getting smaller.
Getting hotter and hotter the furnace was nearing its boiling point and was
going to blow.
The pain throughout his body continued to grow and the
intensity it brought with it started to cause his brain to shut down. The pain
diminished greatly and a febrile calm flashed through him.
“Ahh… here comes
the peace.” His body went limp. “Now
I can die.”
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